四人英语话剧剧本《新梁祝外传》(搞笑版)
《新梁祝外传》
L:梁山伯 Z:祝英台 M:马文才 旁: 英母 英父
(1)《take me to your heart》
旁白:At airport, Zhu Yingtai is going to study English in America, Liang Shanbo sees her off.(机场送别)
梁: Yingtai, I love you so much and I’ll miss you so much.
!
祝: I love you, too! Don’t worry. Shanbo I only love you in this world. I’ll marry you as soon as I’m back. Wait for me just for two years.
梁: I’ll kiss you across the Pacific Ocean.
祝: I’ll kiss you from the other side. Wait for me. BoBo
旁:When Zhu Yingtai studies in America, her parents are planning to marry her to Ma Wencai But now Liang Shanbo doesn't know anything……..
英母:Darling, darling。。。。(拉住英父) 英父: (怒气转身) No matter what you say. The kid's wedding could not be so hasty.
英母:But darling ,Mrs Ma was so cool and was so rich. And……..
被英父打断
英父: I told you many times, now is a new time of reform and opening-up. We could not decide Yingtai’s wedding.
英母:Darling….The Furthest Distance in The World Is not between life and death .But when I stand in front of you ,Yet you do not known that he is so handsome. The furthest distance in the world Is not when I stand in front of you, yet you can not see his love to Yingtai.
马文才上,拿折扇,音乐《非》起
马:I love Yingtai so much. It doesn't matter if you see me or not, I'm standing right there with no emotion. It doesn't matter if you love me or not ,love is right there and it is not going to change. Let me embrace you or let me live in your heart to eternity, silence love ,calmness joy.
英母:oh。That was you. Come in. Sit down please!
马:Uncle, here are my presents,50 bottles of maotai , three Benz and a big house in
the seaside and so on .I hope you will like them! If you promise the wedding, I will feel very happy .
母:There is no doubt that Yingtai must be yours , you are so handsome.
父:(大怒指着马)No way !
马:Why?
英父: Since you asked sincerely, let me tell you generously. Do you know who is张国荣, who is张曼玉?
马:I don’t know.
英父:Do you know who is Cristiano Ronaldo, who is Yao Ming, who is Tom Cruise? 马:I don’t know.
英父:Do you still know who I am and who you are now. 马:I don’t know.
英父:Do you see yourself? you look like a pig who knows nothing? (转向英母)You ask me to marry Yingtai to him, how I can trust?
英母:I have no words. 马:But aunt has accepted my 3 million dollar and presents.
父:Money ?You think money can buy everything? True love is priceless!Only 3 million dollar…. only 3 million dollar…. only 3 million dollar…. (逐渐反应过味来)OK OK You give me 3 million dollar and Yingtai is yours. 掏出钢笔来准备签字
旁:A week later, Zhu Yingtai calls Liang Shanbo from America一周以后,祝英台从美国打来越洋电话
。
梁: Oh, honey, Yingtai I miss you so much, miss you every minute every second. Oh my dear. Are you listening to me?
祝: Listen, Liang Shanbo. I’m calling to tell you that I loved you. But I think you’d better find a better girl.
梁: What? Pardon?
祝: Because I’ll get married. My parents had taken me to marry Ma Wencai He is so handsome. So rich, even richer than Bill Gates. And he is good at 葵花宝典。I love his money and I love his body.
梁: What are you talking about? You wait and see. I’ll give you some color to see see.
祝:Shanbo, If life deceives you, don't be sad, do not be impatient! believe me. Everything is rapidly, everything will pass, But the past of, will become a kind of memory.
梁:FUCK you。 I’ll kill you! I will kill you in America!
祝: America? You can come to America? Hahahaha your English is so terrible
旁:Liang Shanbo can’t face the reality what Zhu Yingtai give up him, and in order to kill Zhu Yingtai, he decided to improve his English and went to America. Everyday he practices English.
旁:A year later, Liang Shanbo found Zhu Yingtai in America
梁: Zhu Yingtai, long time no see, do you still know that who I am. I’m here to kill you.
祝: Liang…Shanbo. Oh, Wencai. He is crazy. He will kill me.
M: You! Get out of here.
梁: You! Get out of here!
马: OK you are stronger than me. I get out of here now!
祝: Please don’t go. Just stay, please. He’ll kill me.
马: I know! But if I stay, he’ll kill me by the way..
祝: You told me you were good at 葵花宝典?
马: Sorry, I’m not good at 葵花宝典. I’m just good at 新华字典
。
祝: Oh, you are a big liar. Just get out of here!! (to Liang Shanbo) Oh, darling, you must kill me?
梁: Yes, I have to. Because I hate you more than I can say.
祝: When we were young, we listened to the MP3, you said you’d love me forever. Don’t kill me, ok? Shanbo.
.
梁: No way! Wherever you go, whatever you say, I’ll kill you. I only know I was born to love you or to kill you. Now I can’t love you, the only choice is to kill you.
祝: Once upon a time, there was a true love in front of me, I didn’t cherish it. If I was to meet him again, I wish to say I love you. If you would ask me how long I would love him, I should say ten thousand years. That man is you, The only man I love in this wild world is you. Only you.(sing)
梁: You must be kidding me.
祝: Please believe in me, you know I love you. I love you just like lao shu ai dami. I want to marry you.\
梁: Really?
祝: Oh, of course. Please don’t kill me!!!!
梁: To kill or not to kill is a …… 此处隐藏:3027字,全部文档内容请下载后查看。喜欢就下载吧 ……
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