初一英语下考试作文讲解5.13

初一英语下考试作文讲解 作文题目：

假设你是李明。你和你的美国笔友Tom相约暑假去参观上海世博会。现在暑假即将来临，请你根据表格中提供的世博会信息给Tom写一封回信，谈谈你对世博之行的计划。（不少于60词）

Let’s go to Expo 2010 Shanghai China Time City Transport July 30 to Aug 5, 2010 Weather Very hot and about 27.4 C Bus, taxi, ferry Interests Pavilion (展览会的) 展示馆

方法与评析：一、关于审题：

英语写作如同中文写作一样，首先要看清楚题目要求你写什么。像上面这道题，中心词就是“计划”，要求你写你对世博之行的计划。其次，同学们要想一想，什么样的语言能够支持写计划。在英文中，如下的语言是写计划常用的 Be going to do / plan to do / will do / decide to do / would like to do 等，写出这样的句子结构，阅卷老师认定你是在写计划。

1

我们再看表格。表格中一共有四项信息，一定要把这四项信息都表述清楚，才是要点齐全。

本次作文的阅卷要求是这样给出的。 作文中包含以下内容为符合要求：

前往时间、天气情况、交通情况、依据兴趣选择展馆参观（至少写出两个以上展馆）

二、从评分标准看写好英语作文的方法。评分标准：

说明：先根据文章整体内容确定档次，然后再档次内评出分数。 第一档（10 – 8 分）

1．所写的内容符合要求，有适当发挥。 2．句子较通顺并恰当运用连词。 3．单词拼写语法错误不超过五个。 第二档（７―５分）

1．所写内容基本符合要求。

2．有少量句子表达错误，但尚可读懂。 3．单词拼写语法错误不超过８个。 第三档（４－２分） 1．所写内容要点不全。 2．句子表达有错误，影响理解。 3．单词拼写语法错误不超过１０个。

2

第四档（１－０分） 1．所写的内容与要求不相关 2．只有少数单词，内有正确句子。 小结：

这说明，任何考场作文都是要点现行的。首先要做到要点齐全，如果要点不全首先进入三档，在本文中就是表格的四项内容都要是齐全的。

实例与又一关键：

那是不是说要点齐全了，而且运用了应该用的语言就算是好作文了呢？请大家阅读下面的文章。 Dear Tom,

I am very happy to write to you, because my holiday is coming. Let’s go to the Expo in Shanghai this summer. We will stay in Shanghai from July 30th to August 5th. The weather will be very hot. The city transport includes bus, taxi, and ferry. We will visit China pavilion for its Chinese culture. We can go to the USA pavilion for its music and dance. We can go to Australia pavilion for it traveling information. We can also go to Space Home pavilion to learn science. I hope to hear from you soon. Yours, Li Ming

3

点评：

这篇文章要点齐全，作者也用到了应该用的语言，但是如果给分的话，只能给５、６分，因为它的语言太平了，没有亮点，没有合理运用连词，也没有适当的解释说明，这就造成了文章读上去比较干涩。如果给文章做适当的润色的话，效果会好很多。 Dear Tom,

I am very happy to write to you, because my holiday is coming. Let’s go to the Expo in Shanghai this summer. We will stay in Shanghai from July 30th to August 5th. The weather will be very hot, so bring a pair of sunglasses and some cool clothes. The city transport includes bus, taxi, and ferry. Taking bus is a good idea. It saves money. We will visit China pavilion for its Chinese culture. We can go to the USA pavilion for its music and dance. If we still have time, we can go to Australia pavilion for it traveling information. We can also go to Space Home pavilion to learn science. What do you think of my plan？ I hope to hear from you soon. Yours, Li Ming

4

点评：

大家看，如果加上适当的解释说明，给文章润色，文章读起来就好很多了。 当然，在我们整合表格信息的同时，如果能够根据自己文章的架构，适当取舍一些内容，并且注意构建文章内部之间的联系，那么这样的文章就完美了。

Dear Tom,

I am very happy to write to you, because my holiday is coming. Are you free from July 30th to August 5th? Let’s go to Shanghai Expo. I will tell you my plan. First, we are going to visit China pavilion. You are interested in Chinese culture, aren’t you? China pavilion will show you what Chinese culture is like. Next, I’d like both of us to visit USA pavilion because I want to know about American music and dance. You will tell me more, right? Of course, if we still have time, we can also go to Australia pavilion and Space Home pavilion, because we are both interested in traveling and science.

There is one thing that I have to make clear. The weather in the summer in Shanghai is very hot. You’d better bring cool clothes, and an umbrella. What do you think of my plan? I hope to hear from you soon. Yours, Li Ming

5