21篇英语幽默笑话小故事带生词解释
21篇英语幽默笑话小故事带生词解释
1.The World's Greatest Swordsman?(n. ?剑客, 击剑手)
At an exhibition of the world's best swordsman, the third-place(排名第三的) fencer(n.剑客,击剑者)took the stage. A fly was released, and with an arc(n.弧) of his sword(n.剑,刀) he cut the fly in half. The crowd cheered. Then the second-place man sliced(slice ?n.薄片vt.削) a fly into quarters. A hush fell in anticipation of the world's greatest swordsman.
His blade came down in a mighty arc - but the insect continued on its way! The crowd was aghast. The greatest swordsman had missed his target completely, yet he continued to smile.
"Why are you so happy?" someone yelled. "You missed!"
"Ah," replied the swordsman, "you weren't watching very carefully. They fly lives, yes - but he will never be a father."
stage ?[n.舞台 take the world stage登上舞台
exhibition ?]n.展览(会)release ?]vt./ n.释(排)放;放开
hush ?v.(使)安静下来 n.安静,寂静
anticipation ?n.预期;预料 in anticipation of ? 期待着
blade ?]n.刀刃,刀片 mighty ?[a.强大的
insect ?]n.昆虫,虫 aghast ?]a.惊骇的
target ?[n.目标,对象,靶子 vt.瞄准 yell ?]vi./ n.号叫,叫喊
2.A Mistake
An American, a Scot( Scotland ?n.苏格兰) and a Canadian were killed in a car accident. They arrived at the gates of heaven, where a flustered St. Peter explained that there had been a mistake. "Give me $500 each," he said, "and I'll return you to earth as if the whole thing never happened."
"Done!" said the American. Instantly, he found himself standing unhurt near the scene.
"Where are the others?" asked a medic.
"Last I knew," said the American, "the Scot was haggling price, and the Canadian was arguing that his government should pay."
accident ?[?ksid?nt] n.意外遭遇,事故
fluster ?[fl?st?] vt.使惊慌失措 flustered惊慌失措的
saint英音:[seint] heaven ?[hev?n]n.天堂
Done 口语(成交) instantly ?[inst?ntli]
ad.立即,立刻 scene ?[si:n]n.场,地点
medic 医生 haggle ?[h?g?l]vi.讨价还价
argue ?[ɑ:gju:]vi.争论(吵,辩) government政府
3.Pig or Witch(女巫)
A man is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road. A woman is driving down the same road. As they pass each other, the woman leans out of the window and yells "PIG!!" The man immediately leans out of his window and replies, "WITCH(女巫)!!" They each continue on their way, and as the man rounds the next corner, he crashes into a pig in the middle of the road. If only men would listen(要是这个男的能听懂那个女人的意思就好了。).
steep ? a.陡的
narrow ?[a.狭窄(隘)的;
lean ? v.(使)倾斜
crash vi.碰撞
4.Response Ability
r
esponse ?n.回答 ability n.能力,技巧
An Ogden(奥格根市), Iowa, minister was matching coins with a member of his congregation for a cup of coffee. When as
21篇英语幽默笑话小故事带生词解释
ked if that didn't constitute gambling, the minister replied, "It's merely a scientific method of determining just who is going to commit an act of charity(仅仅是决定由谁来做一件善事的一种科学方法)
Iowa ?]n.衣阿华[美国州名]
minister ?n.部长,公使,牧师
congregation n.集合在一起的群众
a member of his congregation一位教友
constitute vt.构成 gamble ?赌博
scientific .科学的determine ?vt.决定
commit ?vt.犯(错误等)
charity n.救济金;[ pl.]慈善团体;宽容
Philosopher Bertrand Russell(罗素), asked if he was willing to die for his belief, replied: "Of course not. After all, I may be wrong."
philosopher ?n.哲学家
willing愿意的belief .信仰
5.
A newspaper organized a contest for the best answer to the question: "If a fire broke out in the Louvre(卢浮宫), and if you could only save one painting, which one would you carry out?"
The winning reply was: "The one nearest the exit."
organize vt.组织contest n.比赛;辩驳
6.Jonesie The Great Lion Hunter
A small village was troubled by a man-eating lion. So its leaders sent a message to the great hunter, Jonesie, to come and kill the beast.
For several nights the hunter lay(躺) in wait for the lion, but it never appeared. Finally, he told the village chief to kill a cow and give him its hide(兽皮). Draping盖上the skin over his shoulders, he went to the pasture牧草地,牧场to wait for the lion pasture
In the middle of the night, the villagers woke to the sound of blood-curdling shrieks coming from the pasture. As they carefully approached, they saw the hunter on the ground, groaning in pain. There was no sign of the lion.( curdle v.使凝结shriek ?vi.尖叫approach v.靠近groan ?v.呻吟)
"What happened, Jonesie? Where is the lion?" asked the chief.
"Forget the damn lion!" he howled. "Which one of you idiots let the bull loose?" howl ?[haul]vi./哀号 bull ?[bul]n.公牛 idiot ?n.白痴,傻子,笨蛋
7.Weather Predict
A film crew was on location deep in the desert. One day an old Indian went up to the director and said, "Tomorrow rain." The next day it rained.
A week later, the Indian went up to the director and said, "Tomorrow storm." The next day there was a hailstorm.
"This Indian is incredible," said the director. He told his secretary to hire the Indian to predict the weather.
However, after several successful predictions, the old Indian didn't show up for two weeks.
Finally the director sent for him. "I have to shoot a big scene tomorrow," said the director, "and I'm depending on you. What will the weather be like?"
The Indian shrugged his shoul
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